Fury over School-Gate Fashion Icons

Today I was going to write a heart-warming post about motherhood. But then I read (on CookiesnCandies blog) about the fury generated by a Daily Mail article featuring British Mummy fashion bloggers. The article highlights stay-at-home Mums who take pride in what they wear despite a change in lifestyle and a tight budget. But what was really surprising was the angry comments on the article. Why would this subject elicit such an emotional, visceral response in readers?


Three of the Mummy fashion bloggers featured:

Avril of SchoolGateStyle Source: Daily Mail

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Lucy of The SuburbanStyle Source: Daily Mail

Beth of StyleGuile. Source: Daily Mail

Very fun and friendly and a good read. As I say, what was mystifying was the comments left by readers below the article. Why would a subject so uncontroversial attract so much anger? Here are just a few of the comments:

*Um, really? Don't they have anything better to do than take photo's of themselves, upload them and blog? Who's paying the bills? Doing the housework? Do they have cleaner's and send out the ironing? And all those moemn reading their blogs? What are they doing? All that free time to indulge in something like that especially when you've a home and children to look after.How lovely to be able to shop for new clothes so you have so much choice, drop the kids off and then come home, put your feet up and get on the internet to blog about what you wore.... No wonder housewives are being given a bad name and receiving bad publicity for being self indulgent coffee morning gossipers who live off their husbands, and in these "tough" times too. Clearly not everyone is having a recession eh? Interesting. - Munchkin, London, 08/5/2012 13:09 --- clearly you have some issues, as stated in the article at least one of them does it whilst her toddler is napping, it takes half hour at most to blog.

*Who cares? I mean really and actually cares? You are dropping off your children to school, no one cares what they look like.

*I just love reading the (Daily Mail, Femail) columns -- they give me such a good laugh. . I am constantly amazed at how empty-headed and shallow some women can be. . I mean, thinking it is SOOOO vitally important what to be seen in at the school gates....... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..

*Just who do these women think they are? We had Samantha Brick the other day & now we have these school mums who 'blog' about what they wear to school. I am ashamed to be female. It's all, me,me & more me. I checked out their websites just to check that this was not a joke - oh dear! I wonder what the mums at their schools truly think of them. They are not alone though,we too have a deluded mum who blogs and tweets (not nice stuff) about school & mums, & guess what - she has thousands of followers, but included in those followers are a lot of mums who don't like her, yet she is so deluded she thinks she is one of the most popular mums - I guess thats the problem with social media.School gates should be a safe place for parents to drop off their kids, not a place for competition, one man upship or judging others. My advice to all those mums out there is be nice, & stop trying to make out you are better than everyone else - you will gain a lot more respect & REAL friends.

End of comments

Jody here again - I'm astounded - what drives the anger behind these comments? I asked some of my American friends and here are their answers.

Sue, 45:  Is it that the commenters think these Mommy bloggers are showing off, that they are trying to be stars, that they think have great taste. That they are trying to tell everybody else what to wear? Nothing could be further from the truth - they are not presenting themselves as models or style icons or big spenders, they are just Moms like the rest of us presenting a fun outlet.

Rachel, 40: People just don't realise how much work and commitment it takes to blog every day. They don't give it any credit.

Sam, 70: They are angry at stay-at-homes mothers, that somehow they should "know their place." Or be invisible. Being a stay-at-home Mom in my day earned you a solid place in society and respect. Now it seems no woman earns respect whether she stays at home or goes to work. 

Kas, 35: I agree; it's about putting stay-at-home Moms in their place. None of my Mom friends ever call themselves a stay-at-home Mom even if they are. They will teach Pilates, do ceramics or work in a store for a couple of hours just so they have something else to call themselves at a dinner party. Also women who work think stay-at-home mothers are "getting away" with something - and vice versa - so there is that tension too. The reality is: we're all just trying to do the best we can.

Caron, 50: Women seem so unhappy these days - so much is expected of them - and the anger from these comments taps into that somehow. One friend spends $500 a week on clothes and make-up to somehow stem that deep-seated unhappiness (and she can't afford it) Other people are really hurting financially and they don't feel their voice is heard. There was an NPR thing on this the other day - being a mother - and giving up work - is the first step to poverty.

Sean, 43: Brits, like Kiwis, have that "tall poppies" syndrome. If anyone is perceived as too big or too successful or too showy their stems have to be chopped off. You don't find that in the US.

The final word goes me, Jody, 50. The first pictured Mummy blogger, Avril of SchoolGateStyle only started blogging in January this year and she's already had 50,000 hits - more than 500 every day by lunchtime! She is doing something so very, very right. Good on you all.