Friday, March 2, 2012

Kardashian Fashmashian

Did you ever wake up one morning and think you looked like Kim Kardashian? No? Me neither. So why did I go out and buy this silky steel-grey Jumpsuit that looks exactly like something La Kim would wear? (so, so well) Another fashion feck-up. Oh well, said a friend, at least you've got something to wear on your next sky diving expedition...

Me in Jumpsuit, photoshopped by Harley, 14

I bought it after a lunch with my Positive Enthusiastic Friend (never go shopping with a PE Friend, like  Sixth Sense Boy, they see things that aren't there). I put on the Jumpsuit and PE friend said: "It's perfect! It will be great for that evening soiree in the City. All it needs is...a slim dark brown wraparound belt, long slinky seventies earings and high gold sandals." I don't have any of those. It was two sizes bigger than what I normally wear. But it was on sale, reduced to a third of the price.

Later, at home, another friend surveyed the damage: You need big boobs and bootilicous bum (ie. you need to be Kim) to wear that Jumpsuit. And...it's way too big for you, it needs to be taken in.

Hmmm. So now this purchase has contravened no less than five of my shopping rules. (My eldest Harley, 14, just read this and said: "You've got rules for shopping?")

Jody's Shopping Rules:

1. Never buy something on sale that you wouldn't pay full price for. (Or you can't take back.)
2. The colour, fit and size must all be right. All three of those things. Ah-ah-ah, ALL three.
3. Wearing the piece must not be contingent on buying suitable shoes, belt, earings etc. to go with. You will never find those shoes, belt, earings and the search will drive you crazy.
4. Never buy something for a life you don't have. There are no "soirees in the City" in my future.
5. Never buy something that requires you to swear on your blog. (Feck is not a swear word though right?)

I have not shown you the back view of this jumpsuit, but without Kim's bum it has the poopy droopy effect.

Which reminds me of another poopy pants thing I bought in Spain -  some rather shiny navy low-crotch shorts. Oh, said a friend at the Shorts Viewing when I got home. The worst of those shorts is: there is a slit at the front. Maybe you should put a flower in it? Arrgh!


Any fashion feck-ups in your wardrobe? Go on, make my day!

52 comments:

  1. I had to click on this post because of the title! I have to admit that I watch all the Kardashian shows! I'm guilty! Can't help it. :) I love the photoshopping your son did! That's hysterical! And your shopping rules are great! Too funny! :) You made my day, again! Have a great weekend, Jody!

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  2. i love your jumpsuit! i can never find anything like that haha

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  3. Haha I just had to laugh at this! Sorry for your purchase mistake. I do it all the time. I'm especially know for buying things for events that will most likely never happen. :)

    Have a great weekend! xoxo

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  4. Those are very good rules and I should implement them as well. Fleck is not assess because I know my swears. Maybe you'll go to a 70'stheme party and be dressed perfectly. However, purple in an "in" color.

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    1. Damn auto correct...meant "feck".

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  5. I can't quit laughing! Love the photo by Harley (and his sarcastic remark too). I have so many fashion woopsies that don't know where to start. I was looking at a jumpsuit like that (in black) but luckily my rational side won (which rarely happens). By the way, your PE friend nailed the look verbally. Sorry I keep laughing in my head, not at you of course; at your post. Thanks so much for making my day!
    xx
    maya

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    Replies
    1. Yes some may say it was a cruel and unusual punishment to make my eldest photoshop this...Oh well!

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  6. Uh oh...I think I may be the PE friend...

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    Replies
    1. At least you weren't also responsible for the shorts...is this why you moved to Seattle?

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  7. I am sure it looks grand on you! My husband always says that anything on sale is no good, otherwise it would be well gone at full price!I have proved him wrong on that! Hope you have a lovely weekend:)
    ~Anne

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  8. Talk about CLEVER... I just love this. Every bit of it. A perfect (and hilarious) little break from cleaning =).

    hmmm... my big issue seems to be with boho chic attire. i envision myself as some free flowing, dark, wavy-haired "free people" gals... straight outta the catalog.

    but it always ends up making me look homey, heavy, and worst of all- FRUMPY (that awful word).

    k... back to cleanin' :)...

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  9. hahahah---- I love this! Totally made me giggle. Hmmmm... I used to purchase WAY too many feck ups, but these days I try to be much more deliberate with my purchases (maybe to a fault). HOWEVER--- I do brea a couple of your rules. Specifically about fit. I am all about using the tailor to make something fir ****just**** the way I want it to.

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  10. i was, indeed, PRESENT for the shorts-buying, but i recall LOVING that mango colored silk shirt - wasn't that a good call? and YOU let me buy that fringed affair that looks like i'm toting one of the Westminster show pups around my side!!! :-) guess what i wear every day, though? Our $10 matching scarves!

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    Replies
    1. Yes, there are other mitigating factors which let you- PE friend #2 - off the hook!

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  11. Great post :) and you look gorgeous girl!
    xoxo

    Lara

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  12. Yeah...anything I bought in the 90s lol!
    I've got a few horror stories in my closet's past...I think it's all normal pieces these days!

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  13. haha loved reading this!
    like your hair btw

    xx
    Yvette

    Come join my give-away!
    www.afashionhouseofcards.blogspot.com

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  14. Such a good post and you look so cute! We were looking at Caltrans yesterday at all of the snow in Tahoe. We love that they have added so many new cameras. After seeing all of the snow we were so ready to move back to California!!

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  15. I'm inviting you to join my giveaway for a chance to win a $20 giftcard from sneakpeeq!!!

    here's the link:
    http://ilovemakeup68.blogspot.com/2012/03/sneakpeeq-giveaway-win-20-gift-card.html

    hope you'll drop by and join! have a great day!

    x o x o
    jess

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  16. yes, my vera wang wedding dress to my dirt bag ex- husband!
    i WIN!!!!

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  17. Yup. You've got a great skydiving suit. Or something for a soiree in the city. Excellent buy.

    And it's sufficiently neutral that you can accessorize it til the cows come home.

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  18. Of course there are rules for shopping..... duuuuuuhhhhhh......although most of my stuff is from the Oxfam shop so what do I know.
    p.s..I cannot believe you do not have the belt/earings/shoes combo required for the suit...ok...maybe just the earings?

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  19. The low crotch shorts are a scream! I've had trousers like that before and it's always days before they are in the charity bag. Well, I'm trying to remember my age now when I shop, even last year I was still buying for someone half my age.

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  20. Love the rules, and I'm sure you could make that jumpsuit work -- I believe skinny girls look good in anything. Call me your long distance PE friend :)

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  21. I'm the queen of buying things that don't work. I wanted the Tom's ballet flats and am just now admitting they are too wide for my feet and don't work. Hopefully I can still return? And I own two style mint shirts that have were small to begin with, but I was stubborn and kept them....now they shrunk into crop tops. Not good. Why don't I return right away? I get my heart set on wanting it and logic dies. Ugh. Bad habit.

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  22. you're too funny!ahhh, I think we've all done it, buying things that don't work...and P.S. Kim's boobs & bum are overrated!

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  23. # 2 is so spot on. I'm guilty of having attempted to purchase smaller size shoes just because they were sold out in my size. Not recommended. :P

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  24. No. Never... http://www.metropolitanmum.co.uk/2009/11/is-it-a-bird-is-it-a-thunderbolt-no-it’s-met-mum-in-her-new-coat/

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    Replies
    1. Seen the purple coat and love it, love it, thunderbolts and all!

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  25. Another great laugh. Fashion feck-up is actually my current personal style. I'm rocking it.
    Seriously though, your shopping rules need to be my shopping rules.
    xo

    PS I secretly love the kardashians. I want Khloe and Lamar to adopt me, even though I'm older than them.

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  26. haha, yes I have bought some things I thought looked great...and then only wore them maybe once before putting it in the "I'm over it"pile! It happens to us all! :)

    xoxo,
    Taylor

    taylormorgandesign.blogspot.com

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  27. I think - no, I know - I have broken every single rule on the list at some stage. And it is sooo unfair that you can look that good in a jumpsuit 2 sizes too big :-(

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  28. this post remindsme that i need to go and return something at the mall... great post!

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  29. I too owned a jumpsuit, two in fact. Marks & Spencers, circa 1989, one in red, one in black. Flew across the Atlantic in the black one...nightmarish in a plane's bathroom, had to hold the bulk of it between my knees, to stop it from dropping around my ankles and onto the disgusting floor, to go to the toilet. And the red one, cinched at the waist with a wide, soft black leather belt, just made me look like father Christmas!

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  30. I recently heard someone say that you will never like the clothing more than in the changeroom when you're trying it on so if you don't love it there, don't buy it. I thought that was very wise and sage advice. BTW, come by tomorrow. I've tagged you in a game.

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    1. Carol - you're so right. Which is why I normally go shopping without make-up and my hair tied back. The clothes really have to try hard!

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  31. This made me laugh out loud because I've sooo been there! And, if often happens when one shops after a couple of glasses of wine at lunch (just saying). That photoshopped image is HILARIOUS! :)

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  32. I've bought so many things that I have never worn or only worn once. Don't feel bad I think we've all done!

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  33. Being a chap of a certain age clothes are now of no real concern, in mitigation the tyranny of pink inflicted upon me by my little girls leaves me little time for my own sartorial concerns.

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  34. Not to be a PE but that jumpsuit looks cute on you at least from the front! I agree about not buying stuff on sale though that you otherwise wouldn't buy--who hasn't done that! Thanks btw for the sweet birthday wishes!

    xo Mary Jo

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  35. You are so funny!! I love the photoshopped image!! But I really like the way this jumpsuit looks on you!

    Have a lovely week! xoxoxo

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  36. Jody, this post simply cracked me up. :) Purchase mistakes, hmm, well, there were times when I bought things I knew I had nothing to pair them with just because they were on sale. xo
    Ada

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  37. So funny! Love the photo of you in Jumpsuit!! Great post :)

    xx

    www.sickbytrend.com

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  38. Jody- I bet you could take that jumpsuit for a night on the town! Maybe not a morning on the town, but a night , for sure!

    I have a closet full of thrift and swaps, so my bad thing is wearing pants with legs way too short for me. That nice break that's suppose to hit over the shoes is way up near my ankles, always!

    Loretta

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  39. Rule number one is soooo important!!! I cannot tell you how many throw away items I have because it was on sale.

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  40. Great post still laughing at photot. I did wear a jumpsuit in my early twenties and I loved the outfit.so much. They were a peach colour in cotton with a drawstring waist. What was I thinking?

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  41. Not recently since I've just had a big closet clean out, but oh, have there been.

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  42. Great shopping tips! I follow #1 religiously! xo style, she wrote

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  43. Hahahahah! That fist pick is totally hilarious!

    xx

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  44. We've all been there. The photoshopped image is a classic. I truly think you should display it proudly in your home. Sadly, I may have the booty for the jumpsuit!!

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  45. Your shopping rules are cool. Even Zen.

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  46. My shopping rules are: Don't buy anything - cos I always feck it up. I wait for the next charity bag to go around from someone else, rummage around in that before passing it on. No money lost, (altho' alas no style gained either.... )

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