Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Hallows Gallows Humour

Spoiler Alert: If you haven't seen Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows this post will read like a bunch of old bollocks.

Cy at the movie
Two weeks of cold and dreary weather has enveloped me in a pasty-faced dark-clothed ennui. Much like "Grey Lady," the ghostly basement-bound Helena Ravenclaw in Harry Potter... except without the fabulous cheek bones and her ability to swoosh away from kids who ask too many questions.

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The truth is, despite all the comings and goings, I have been spending waaay too much time with my kids. To their endless questions about "Where is my...(insert any of following: pen, hat, lunch, candy money, day of fun-filled activity) I have tried Helena's enigmatic: "If you have to ask, you don't know. If you know where it is, you may ask" or words to that effect. But the result is snorting derision from the elves rather than a sprint off to the Room of Requirement.

I also have to report that the elves are not following orders:

*Cy, 7, shaved his legs. Everyone does it at the tennis courts, he said, including the coaches. I told him his leg-hair will grow back long and black. "Who cares" he shrugged: "I'll just shave them again."
*I asked Harley,13, to email Jackson,12, at his week-long sleepaway camp. I was hoping for a sweet brotherly note. Harley noted there was a Bellyflop Olympics. "J-Dawg" he wrote Jackson: "Win the Bellyflop competition or don't bother coming home."

Jackson and friend Chase at camp
*When Jackson got back from camp I asked Tallulah to give him a hug. Without a hint of irony she said: "Jackson was away?"

Tallulah in backyard

*After Harley spent 12 hours straight watching TV, I told him he needed to get more exercise. The next day I found him lifting weights...horizontal...while watching TV.

Nothing else for it: I headed off to my nearest Room of Requirement. Turns out there is no ennui that a new sequined sweatshirt can't cure. It's the veritable Resurrection Stone of spending. (Unless those sparkles belong to a diadem and your name is Valdemort.) And then the sun came out...


How do you cure your ennui?


28 comments:

  1. oh my god i laughed! and then i laughed harder when i got to "Jackson was away?" ah, family life. gorgeous post.

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  2. As usual, I am sitting here laughing. Glad Jackson is back and hoping of belly flopping rewards strung around his neck. I am just beginning to work through my closet. Think there is too much crammed into too small of a space. Sensory overload...which causes ennui in its own right. Just pulled out a cute jewel-toned Madewell purple dress (semi-hidden/tag still on) and an old belt w/black wedges. Ahhh. Happiness. I solemnly swear to shop in my closet for the next month only. No shopping otherwise so I will kindly remove the sequined sweatshirt that I was going to steal from you from said Banana shopping cart. It's glittery glory is persuasive. Really? Really!!

    As for curing ennui, consider this: last weekend's girls birthday getaway where one of the seven actually packed 3 (yes you read that right) Jessica Simpson hair pieces. Had all of us over 40 crowd all ohhhing and ahhhing and pulling out the iPad for possible purchasing. Sure, I'd like a more polished and full pony... just for starters. Who wouldn't? Bummer is I just swore to you that I will not shop so the wig/wiglets will be considered as future fall purchases or left up for grabs for you. In the meantime, I will be swallowed up by the depths of my closet channeling Helena Ravenclaw from a different perspective. Nice knowing ya.

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  3. too funny, you always make me laugh. that is glitter goodness that I need!

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  4. Great post, even to someone who hasn't read nor seen the lastest Harry Potter. :) Your kids are such fun and I adore the sequinned sweater. Oh-so-fabulous!

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  5. your daughter's insouciant behaviour towards her brothers is hilarious!

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  6. The best cure for ennui is a good winter's sleep, or summer-time nap. Can't beat it. Trust me.
    Fascinating stories about your cubs — er, um, children. The say the most interesting things.
    Ah yes, Hairy Potter. Knew him well. The Bear who spent his summers working at a greenhouse.

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  7. that's highly amusing. love it

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  8. This is amazing, and I am not even a "Harry Potter" fan.
    Kudos. :)

    http://www.glamkittenslitterbox.com/
    Twitter: @GlamKitten88

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  9. What did you think of Harry Potter?! LOL about the shaving legs and giving her brother a hug! Love the sparkly top.

    Off and on Ive been feeling that same way, but right now Im trying to get back into things. Ive been riding my bike, going for walks with my husband, and reading a new book.

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  10. PS I actually took my stepdaughters to the midnight showing of Harry Potter! At first when I saw the line around the corner I thought I must be going crazy! But they were letting some people in already and we were some of those people! We had a good time and its a great memory to share with them.

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  11. Harry potter! *sigh* I love that series.
    This is a cute post. I love how you incorporated HP to the whole post. :D

    :)
    Carrie
    http://readmylifeascarrie.blogspot.com/

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  12. Ha ha! Voldermort, my'dear! Voldermort! And how do I cure ennui? I have a good swish around with the sword of Gryffindor, that's how!

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  13. haha i havent seen the new harry potter yet and still laughed about this :) ahh the joys of motherhood.

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  14. I just love reading about your kids - each and every one of them has such a fun, quirky personality. You never know what they'll say next! :)

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  15. I am SOOOOO glad I discovered your blog. You make me laugh but more importantly you tell us things that make me realize my 13 and 10 year old are not alone in their silly behaviour:)

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  16. Love it. I am sure my 6 and 4 year old boys will be just like that in a few years (who I am kidding? They are like it now).

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  17. Ha. your daughter is too funny. So typical, right?
    xo
    Alexa
    www.theshortandthesweetofit.com

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  18. Your kids' comments and antics completely made me laugh. They sound like my kids!

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  19. hmmm... so maybe i didn't understand so much of what was said in this post... i'm not a harry potter gal myself. BUT i enjoyed the pics and I agree that the sweater is totally lovely!

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  20. As always there is so much to make me smile in this post. Horrified at the shaving legs routine: are they serious!?
    Did Jackson win the belly-flop olympics? I suspect not as he doesn't seem to have a big belly and I bet there were bigger ones about.

    I'm off now to the Room of Requirement. Do you need anything while I'm there?

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  21. Hilarious! You kids are soooo normal!

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  22. Hahah, I have to admit, I didn't read your post because I haven't seen the movie yet and didn't want to spoil it. However, I did scroll down enough to see that sequiny sweater you're wearing and I'm in LOVE! Seriously gorgeous.

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  23. That "brotherly note" cracked me up. So funny!

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  24. I love Tallulah! She rocks!!!

    But how do I cure my ennui? Reading your posts my dear!!

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  25. Omg, I laughed so hard when I read the J-Dawg letter! I came across a letter recently that my brother sent me when I was at camp that was addressed to Jo Jo Rizzle (he was a huge african american football player). You describe your kids' reactions so perfectly, i hope you are writing a book Jody. I hope to do some adult socializing in the near future (when I'm moved back to LA over the weekend). Wishing you a fabulous and sparkly weekend!

    xo Mary Jo

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  26. Hi! I like this post so much, sounds like you had really great time!
    If you want come and visit my blog, and if you like, follow me!

    http://cosamimetto.blogspot.com/

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