Monday, October 1, 2012

My Nike Slide Years

After my last post, I've been thinking a lot about what it means to get older. On the weekend a friend who's also 50 said: "All I want to wear is stretchy pants and loose cardigans. Hello Eileen Fisher Years!" Funnily enough, I'm starting to dress the same as a 15-year-old boy. I'm calling it  My Nike Slide Years....

Harley, 15, and his Nike-slides-and-black-socks look
I spotted Harley's shower shoes - "Nike Slides Mum" - worn with black socks. Got him to order me these beauties in purple. Sweet as. (Do the young folk still say that?)

You also know you're an old bag when....

1. You go to the exhibition of Cindy Sherman at SF Moma featuring her rendition of sad, aging Hollywood hopefuls. Note to self: best go a bit easier on the lip liner and bronzer.

Cindy Sherman 

2. You go to the same restaurant four weekends in a row. Well, you just know what you're getting then, don't you? Lovely.

Sugarcane rolls at Xyclo

3. Your friend tells you about her old Mum playing (seated) balloon volleyball with her friends and you think it's sounds a bit of a lark. Cocktail in hand of course.

4. You have a Black Tie event coming up. Instead of buying this Laundry dress, you decide to just rent it. The way your bat flaps are progressing, you won't be able to wear it again anyway.



5. You start to explain the bizarre premise of Hope Springs to your friend: "Meryl Streep has been married to Tommy Lee Jones for 30 years and they haven't had sex for the last five."

Your friend replies: "Yeah... and??"

6. You spent hours gazing out at this little touch of flower-sparkle in pots. Lovely.




7. The weekends heralds a heatwave of 100 degree temperatures. (Very) begrudgingly you shave your legs.


8. At your hip hop class this morning, your teacher leads you in a dance incorporating a LMFAO move on the floor. Scrambling to your knees, you call out to the rest of the class: "Man still down. Carry on, I'll join you on the 4th count!"

9. Talking of hip hop, your son tells you about J12 - the latest "Gettin Saucy"dance here in Oakland. Stick it on your blog, he's says, you'll be the first blogger in the world to feature it. That was eight months ago...forgot about it until now...So here it is!  The (kinda) latest dance from Oakland. For all you Mofo Mamas who are going to bust your moves this Saturday night: just lean back and pretend you're driving, then swing your left arm...and Slow Down!



Will you be embracing your Nike Slide Years?


54 comments:

  1. Great post! Don't worry though -- twenty somethings to do this, too! "(Very) begrudgingly you shave your legs." xo style, she wrote

    ReplyDelete
  2. Don't wear that kind of thing on my feet. Doesn't fit my orthotic shoe inserts very well. (One leg is longer than the other.) Good, substantial tie-up shoes. Like when I was a kid.

    Which might explain why I may be in my second childhood?

    ReplyDelete
  3. You are something else and never fail to cause me to LMFAO! The dress looks smashing. At 50... I find myself in yoga pants more often than anything. Flip flops, definitely until my tootsies go numb!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Had a good giggle reading this! I think we all secretly would love to live in stretchy pants and cardys - just not brave enough to not care yet!! X

    ReplyDelete
  5. Cindy Sherman was by far the best art exhibit I have seen in a long time. I just loved it. Being over 40, I could totally relate to all the drawn on eyebrows. Seriously. Who doesn't right? These ladies are my peeps! Top it off by the fact that I recently had Botox and couldn't for the life of me figure out why I looked a little funny. Then it came to me this morning. Snap! My right eyebrow looks higher than my left. Lordy lordy. Just in time for Halloween. A lot easier to embrace my inner Nike slip on shoe during the month of October. The weirdos are out in spades. Spot the luny! xoxo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why don't I get my other side done - and we can be the Lopsy Botoxy Twins for Halloween?

      Delete
  6. Are bat flaps the same as tuck shop arms (top of the arm) ....if so then I couldn't see any evidence of them! You look stunning in that dress....my bet is that your husband won't be able to wait five years......Rx

    ReplyDelete
  7. You look absolutely beautiful in that dress - no bat flaps (or I call them bingo wings) in sight! I have always loved Eileen Fisher clothes - they look so comfy if a little shapeless.

    ReplyDelete
  8. J12 and ADIDAS "slides", baby...
    that's my new 50. in 10 years, of course (NOT)
    That's a catchy tune, slow down.

    ReplyDelete
  9. The Nike slide years sound divine! I would if I could get away with it yet but I can see the hubs putting his foot down about this one. The dress looks fabulous on you - my friend has one very similar ... but you do wear yours exceedingly well.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hmm, I can't see that dance catching on. Did it? And J12, what sort of a name is that? Their size?

    Anyway, I can't spend my time in super casual clothes as I have to go to work and they'd take a dim view if I turned up in Nike Sliiiiides and a pair of les joggings. I wear Crocs at home (in winter, with snug socks) and flippies in summer.

    That dress looks lovely. I'm trying to decide if I give a shit about bingo wings or not. The jury's still out as they are not too flappy yet...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Big Big here in the Bay Area - they are having J12 dance competitions...but who knows about the rest of the world. Certainly its really really simple. Not like in our day when we had to master Sat Night Fever!

      Delete
  11. You do make me laugh. In fact number 5 about 'Hope Springs' had me laughing out loud .. what does that say about me? You look STUNNING in that dress, oh to have your wonderful figure!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hahaha...that was brilliant! You look amazing in that dress...I would wear that every day if my figure is like that when I'm your age, your not even old anyways...beautiful! xx

    ReplyDelete
  13. First of all, let me tell you something. Jody, if I have your amazing figure, I would wear that dress out EVERY single day. In fact, I'd alternate with a bikini.

    LOLOLOL! I haven't heard sweet as for such a long time. Well, unless I head back to NZ, that is.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I already am embracing them! And actually having more fun now!! So slow down and enjoy, HeHeHeHe.....
    Love Di ♥

    ReplyDelete
  15. Do I see nike slides peeking out from under your blue evening dress?

    ReplyDelete
  16. yep! life begins at 50!! who wants to be young and stupid and poor and scared? i love that I do not care one tiny bit what anyone thinks about my shoes, my dress code, my zip code or my car make...

    ReplyDelete
  17. Bat flaps.. yep, and then the triceps get a little flappy too. You look fab in the dress and I say wear it while you can! All your comments are so funny and (as a fifty..plus year old..) I can relate to every comment. A good sense of humor is so important.

    {had the dr. appt yesterday to find out my cholesterol is way up.. yippie!}

    ReplyDelete
  18. you look anything but old in your dress-very hot. my nike slide years will be spent in pajamas...really. I love wearing pjs-my favorite part of the weekend is sleeping in and then wearing pjs as late as possible.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Hahahahahah..... I don't give too much credence to your aging philosophy- after all you look amazing in the Laundry dress. Plus I can't believe some of the things I do now (early bed time, maternity sweatpants that I promise to never wear in public- please don't tell anyone!) and refuse to attribute them to aging. Refuse. Thank you for again making me laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Oh you betcha! The thing about getting older is you can do less experimenting because you know what works for you and what's more practical.

    You look gorgeous in that blue black-tie dress. And you're doing hip hop classes?! I bow to you ...

    ReplyDelete
  21. If my knees weren't knackered, I would exercise (yeah right..) and if I didn't have this medical condition called 'addictedtocarbs' I would be slim.........and then I could hope to look half as good as you do in that dress.

    ReplyDelete
  22. My husband changed 'sweet as' to 'Sweden' a few years ago in true Kiwi 'shorten/nickname' everything style. Unfortunately he neglects to elaborate to our English friends who text him, ask him if he's coming to the pub to who he replies 'Sweden' and then is surprised when there's no one there to drink beers with.
    By the way you look uber hot in the dress. Don't worry about bingo wings, just wear lots of perfume so that those standing nearby get watery eyes and blurred vision so the outline of your arms is less distinct (although they look bloody fine to me). Either that or drink 2 glasses of wine before you go out and you'll feel like Christy Turlington (the trick is to then maintain that buzz and not tip too far into Britney Spears post Federline mode). Sweden.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ha! Sweden on the Christy T. spray! You need to get a job as beauty editor on one of the glossy mags, best advice I've heard this year.

      Delete
  23. Oh, I'm so old. Older than my years, probably. I had to turn the video off because I thought it so offensive. Yes, that's right: I'm turning into my mother. UGH! I must find a way to remain somewhat cool before my kids start rolling their eyeballs at me. Oh, wait, too late.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is offensive, you're right. But I'm finding most commercial vids offensive too...

      Delete
  24. So funny sadly I can identify myself with almost every post the comfortable clothes, hairy legs but what was particularly true was going to the same restaurant week in week out.

    But not many 50 year olds look that great in a dress like you. No fake tan and lip liner in sight

    ReplyDelete
  25. # 7 hit home. Sometimes I could audition for King Kong.

    ReplyDelete
  26. You look great in the dress, so perhaps you should buy it instead of renting it.

    No Nikes in my future, I promise.

    ReplyDelete
  27. This is just the laugh I needed first thing this morning! It also has me slightly worried because I am already embracing my Nike Slide Years...

    ReplyDelete
  28. Was that a typo or did you mean Hip op instead of Hip-hop? A similar result spending a lot of time sprawled across the floor....

    As for J12 - the latest "Gettin Saucy"dance sensation...If it's still going after 8 months you are not talking about a passing fad but a way of life which has out lasted most marriages…..

    ReplyDelete
  29. Love your post. I guess I need to take a hip hop class in case Gettin Saucy ever makes it to Orange County, somehow I doubt it will, but you never know!

    xo Mary Jo

    ReplyDelete
  30. Seriously...could you look more fabulous in that gown? Your body looks amazing! :)

    ReplyDelete
  31. this was the post of the DAY. it's so funny. and i'm quite partial to the latest dance crazes...for real. and now that i live in switzerland i miss them. so please you and your son keep me up to date!!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Oh I'm relating to every word - we had an afternoon/evening in London this week for a show & meal, and all I could think about was how late I'd be getting to bed!And I haven't shaved my legs for about a month because I'm "saving" them til I go on holiday at the end of October!
    I really felt my age when I was joking with one of the Mums in the school playground as she was moaning about being 30, then I realised I could be her Mum!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh meant to say, you look amazing in that dress!

      Delete
  33. Teddy doesn't look like he's worried about Nike Slide years!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Love popping by as I ALWAYS get a good laugh or two! Will be hitting the gym once I am cleared for working out and can see that "join you in the next 4 count" moment happening to me:)
    C

    ReplyDelete
  35. I remember when I turned 40 and was begrudgingly forced to admit that the days when women could let themselves go and take up smoking and get fat were over:( Maybe 50 is the new 40!!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Jandals AND socks?

    I thought that was a quaintly English habit, and not one afflicting our youth.

    If that's you in that Laundry dress, then I can see no sign of "Bat Flaps" whatever they may be, and it looks gorgeous.

    I always find that I have to shave my knees before I wear my kilt, and a light coating of bronzer hides most of the varicose veins.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Omg Cindy Sherman exhibits scare me! Always. Btw just noticed I wasn't following your blog, which explains why I never get your updates in my reader. Remedied!

    ReplyDelete
  38. What a great post! You look amazing in that dress!!

    ReplyDelete
  39. My husband plays proper volleyball but he's really getting too old for all that leaping about and comes home with one or more joints injured. Will suggest sitting down with a balloon.

    ReplyDelete
  40. I am too jealous thinking about your wonderful weather forecast to worry about anything Nike.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
  41. PAZ E PROSPERIDADE...

    Passando por uma breve visita e quero lhe dizer que adorei o seu blog, Que Deus esteja contigo. sucesso, paz e prosperidade... Parabéns pelo blog. Aguardo a sua visita em meu blog;

    http://inkdesignerstampas.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  42. Wow, those colors look wonderful on you! You're really pretty too. <3 I have the Too Faced Natural Eye palette and I love it.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Wait a minute how did i miss you in this stunning electric blue dress!!! you look amaze-balls ..... kelly ripa-ish on the body! go mama . . . ok now you have to post the YSL goldies PLEAZZZZZ

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Emma will post - they really were comfy as promised by the shop dude - won't be able to link them though as embarrassed by the cost. However marginal utility (another economic term I can convert for my own use) - well worth it as will wear forever!

      Delete
  44. I spotted Harley's shower shoes - "Nike Slides Mum" - worn with black socks. Got him to order me these beauties in purple. Sweet as. (Do the ... nikeslides.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...